Monday, February 8, 2010

i am at it again

this ranting about pain in my pelvic area, somewhere above my tailbone each month is getting a tad boring. believe me, i'm tired of it. but i just don't know how to get around it. i used to remember that i'm stronger than any pain the world throws at me. what happened to that girl? i wonder. where is she now? i miss that girl - the girl who can take on the world without resorting to wetting her eyes.

each time, i tell myself that all this shall pass. that there will be light at the end of this dark tunnel. but who am i kidding? all this positive self-talk is getting too cliched that they no longer work for me. there's one thing that works, albeit temporarily, is me reaching out to the one person who somehow gives me hope. but even that has some expiry - in my mind. although he won't tell me up front to stop bothering him - THAT I KNOW for some reason - , there will come a time that he will walk out of this, eventually. the sad thing is, i won't be able to blame him. who would want someone who can't be stronger for herself?

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hi! thanks for reading. do you have or know anyone with adenomyosis? perhaps we could share experiences. would love to hear yours and possibly offer support.